Extract from chaimbentorah.com
Dabar (H1696 verb H1697 noun) has been recognized as a more direct, clear, and forceful speech. Some have even equated it with the Greek noun rhema (with its corresponding verb epo or ereo). A comparable English word is rhetoric. It is speaking more sincerely, an intimate uttering from the heart.
Amar (H561 noun (m) H565 noun (f)) is merely an everyday conversation, based on the Hebrew word "amar" meaning "to say" or "said". In Greek the corresponding noun is "logos" and the verb is "lego"
See too John 8:43 Why do you not understand my speech (in Greek "lalia", the sounds Jesus was making)? Because you are not able to listen to my word (logos), i.e. the quiet logic that underlies it.
Let me use a husband and wife as an example. The husband and wife are traveling and the wife is giving directions. She will say (Dabar, Rhema), “Ok, turn to the left at the next stoplight.” But if they are engaging in a personal conversation (Amar, Lego) she may snuggle up to her husband, take his arm and say: “Honey (dear, sweetheart, sweetums) let’s stop at that restaurant we always like.”
There are times God simply amar’s to us: “Don’t watch that movie.”
Then there are times God will snuggle up to us and dabar “My beloved,” and then amar “Let’s go over that passage of Scripture I pointed out to you this morning.”
Like an old married couple, they can easily sense when their mate is coming on to them and they respond accordingly. So too with God, we need to grow in our relationship with Him to be like Moses where we can tell when God is either seeking intimacy with us or He is just wanting to guide us or both.
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